miss bones !’s blog

Okay, question before anything else.

Have the FUCK do you get this piece of shit stolen works :

 

THIEF

 

Nightmare Creature R.C.C.

The beings known simply as nightmare creatures are cursed beings that are forced to walk the world with constant conflict and turmoil in their lives. The nightmare creature is similar to were creatures being afflicted by an evil virus known only as the vile mutation, and one can only become a nightmare creature if killed by a nightmare creature. The nightmare creatures natural form is of a seven foot tall, blue reptilian skinned humanoid (very fine scales) with leathery bat-like wings. Sharp yellow claws and long razor fangs are some of the creatures natural defenses.

The eyes are always reptile-like and usually red, yellowish gold, sea green, or a deep sky blue. The nightmare creature can shapeshift into anything, the most common ploy is to transform into a small child of any race and luring foolish adventures into dark alleys making them it’s next meal and effectively creating another nightmare creature. Regardless of what the nightmare creature changes into there are some characteristics that will still be the same and those are, the eyes will always be the same color of the original creature except it can make it’s pupil look more round and human looking instead of the vertical slit like a reptile eye in the beast’s natural form. The other characteristic are the fingernails which will always be yellow like the nightmare creature’s but can be made to look shorter instead of the usual claw.

The victims body will rise after three days and live a life as a nightmare creature (similar to vampires and other supernatural). The nightmare creature has superior shape changing abilities, and can create horrific illusions to frighten and torment others. Another ability of these evil creatures is to induce insanity in their victims leaving people with life long phobias and fears (hence nightmare creature).

The vile creatures can also inflict beings with the awful disease known as the vile mutation that causes death and dismemberment to other beings if they are not killed by the nightmare creature and only wounded (if a victim is cut and inflicted and escapes the clutches of the evil nightmare creature the victim may sill die from the vile mutation disease all nightmare creatures carry to their graves, turning the dead victim into another nightmare creature in three days, unless they can recover and live from the vile mutation affliction then no transformation is taken place. Victims need to save vs. disease to avoid dying and becoming a nightmare creature.). The vile mutation is located in all parts of the body fangs, claws, blood, urine and stool, if any of these things are injected into the blood stream, via. bite, scratch, injection, or otherwise, the victim has a chance of contracting the disease.

These creatures are dreaded and feared by all things including supernatural who the nightmare creatures love to torment and feed upon their abundance of P.P.E. energy. Nightmare creatures are usually hunted and killed by anything other than other nightmare creatures, the justice rangers have declared war on these vile creatures of darkness and hunt them anywhere they go, due to a conflict with the very first nightmare creature leaving ten justice rangers dead from the cruel beast. If a town, village or hamlet is tortured by these fiends the justice ranger will either rid the town of it’s supernatural foe or die trying.

Nightmare creatures first appeared in rifts earth in 101 P.A. when a foolish summoner opened a doorway to the nightmare creatures home world of swirling darkness and gray shifting mist. The summoner was simply peering into the portal of evil when a nightmare creature lashed out and ripped the poor summoner’s chest out and greedily devoured the sweet flesh as the summoner’s portal closed.

 

The sommoner died and laid upon his layer’s floor for the three days soon rising afterwards and walked the earth as a nightmare creature inflicted with the vile mutation, and that is the coming of the first nightmare creature on earth, from a person born of rifts earth and inflicted with a deadly disease sworn to turn the rest of rifts earth into a nightmare creature paradise. The sommoner\nightmare creature went on a killing spree that ended in a small town somewhere in California’s new west the creature was hunted by a small band of cyber-knights and justice rangers and a few sheriffs to destroy this foul evil creature. The battle ended up with half the cyber-knights all the justice rangers (part of the reason the rangers hate these creatures so much) and two of the sheriffs dead at the hands of this vile fiend.

The remaining few burned their companions and the vile creature that killed them, fire is the only thing that can stop anyone from becoming this evil creation after they have been killed by one of these evil monsters and that is what must be done after a nightmare creature is killed, if this is not completed at the time of death the nightmare creature has a chance (not always) to rise in three days again and seek revenge on his would be assassins. Water is the only other substance that has any effect on the nightmare creatures making it very hard to kill a creature that is so immune to lasers, plasma, bombs and explosions (they can knock the creature down, and stun ect. but no real damage), ion, particle beam, projectiles, and all other manner of fire arms, disease, poisons, drugs, gases, bullets, punches, and kinetic based attacks, but the beast is still vulnerable to magic weapons (rune swords, millennium tree weapons, powerful holy weapons) ect., magic in general, psionics, mind control, hypnotic suggestion, fire (magic and normal fire both do full damage), and water (magic i.e. warlock and elemental magic) normal water as well (see rifts vampire kingdoms for great TW water guns), mirror’s will hold the creature at bay (like a cross for vampires) only, no damage even if hit with a mirror it only frightens the monster to see it’s own terrible visage, if the creature is cornered with the mirror and trapped scared, it may lash out in fear breaking the mirror, it will no longer hold the creature at bay (watch out!). The nightmare creature is effectively a supernatural predator.

Even the valiant efforts of these few champions didn’t stop the twisted fate of the nightmare creature that now is becoming more and more common throughout the wilderness and very popular in Mexico where the nightmare creatures love to work in vampire groups and other undead beings and evil sorcerers as well as supernatural demons of all kinds, but even these fiends find it hard to trust such an abomination and frequently try to drive away these evil shape-changing monsters usually forcing them to live a solitary existence.

Nightmare Creature R.C.C. also known as the Nightmare Beast, Night Prowler, Evil Death Changer, Death’s Lover, and The one who kills for fun and eats your guts, and shits out only bones and fur, this is the name juicers like to use (ha ha).

Requirements:

None, the creature will be someone who was killed by a nightmare creature left to transform into one of these evil creations, or has got the vile mutation from a nightmare creature. The character is totally reborn with these new stats and abilities.

Stats:

I.Q.: 3d6, M.E.: 4d6+2, M.A.: 4d6+2, P.S.: 5d6+5, P.P.: 5d6+5, P.E.: 4d6+1, P.B.: 2d6, Spd.: 6d6+10. Note: P.S. and P.E. are supernatural, so bites and punches and kicks do M.D. damage plus disease if victim is cut by the fiend.

H.P.:

Starting H.P.’s will be P.E.+4d8x10 +100 + 1d4x10 per level plus level one.

Alignment:

Any evil or selfish only, no good creatures exists.

Psionics:

Minor psionic needs to save 12 or higher, The nightmare creature gets four sensitive powers, and four physical powers at level one, no healing powers can be selected. The nightmare creature gets two psionic powers per level and can select super psi powers only at level 3 and up, no healing powers can be selected ever. Starting I.S.P. is M.E. plus 2d4x10 + 3d6 per level including level one.

Magic:

The nightmare creature is an all right spell user that is more of a natural spell caster other than a spell caster that studies the art. Spells come to the creature in meditation or trances that the creature does instead of normal sleep. The creature gets three spells at level one from any level one spells, the creature gets two spells per level and can only choose spells equal to or lower than the creatures current level. Starting P.P.E. is M.A. +3d6x10 +6d6 per level of creature including level one.

Special R.C.C. bonuses:

Plus one melee attack, +3 to Strike, +4 to Parry, +5 to dodge, +3 to roll with punch, +4 to Initiative, +5 vs. magic, and +6 vs. psionics, +3 vs. HF and another (+1) vs. HF at levels, three, six, nine, twelve, and fifteen. Gets a +20% Vs. Coma and Death.

Natural Abilities:

Immune to Poisons (both lethal and non-lethal), Disease, Drugs, Gases, Bullets, Lasers, Plasma, Bombs, Particle Beams, Ion’s, Punches, Kicks, all kinetic based attacks, do no damage but can stun, knockdown, knockout, a nightmare creature, still can be hurt by fire, water, magic, psionics, mind control, magic and holy weapons, as stated earlier. Horror Factor of 13 plus 1 to H.F. at levels, two, four, eight, eleven, and fifteen. Flight winged, the nightmare creature can fly with it’s leathery wings, it is very fast and agile creature in the air (like dragons and gargoyles), Maximum speed is 70 mph. plus 5 mph at levels three, five, seven, nine, eleven, thirteen, and fifteen. The creature has diseased fangs and claws and can kill anyone who is cut or bitten by the monsters claws or fangs, the victim must roll to save vs. lethal disease or contract the vile mutation turning the victim into a nightmare creature in three phases each phase takes one week. Phase one takes one week, the victims gets red eyes, green hue to the skin, knobs forming at the shoulder blades, if a person gets a remove curse spell in the first phase they can recover in six weeks with no ill effects, but if the first week (phase) is missed the character is doomed to become a nightmare creature. Phase two the person gets a flu like symptom and the eyes begin to glow and turn color from red to bluish, to green, to gold then back to red ect., their skin becomes rough and starts to peel, forming of the scales, the knobs on the shoulder blades turn to long protruding bone like shapes, one to two feet long, the person looks horrid and will frightened all who see them HF:11, they smell bad and have longer teeth and sharper fingernails, the person is in such a bad state they have no P.P. bonus to strike, parry, or dodge, and attacks per melee are half, plus the victim always loses init. every time, movement is at half rate. The third phase is the worst, the victim will vomit blood all the time, and a thick green gel like substance will be leaking from the entire being, the person will always be tired and want to sleep, the gel will form around the person and make a hard resinous cocoon (cocoon has 200 M.D.C. and regenerates 4d6 per melee) that will last the remaining time of the transformation, when the last week is up the nightmare creature will break out to wreak havoc on the world. The nightmare creature can shape change into any type of normal human or animal shape as long as the size does not go over twelve feet long or tall or under three feet long or short can maintain this shape as long as it desires (some people believe them to be kin of Changelings because of this ability, but the nightmare creature is not a kin to them in any way it’s only rumor) the creature retains all it’s powers abilities and hit points that it normally had it just looks different (same basic rules as the changeling found in the Rifts conversion book see them for more info). Nightvision 500’ the nightmare creature can see in normal and magical darkness. Horrific Illusion: The creature can make a horrific illusion (like the spell) upon will, the nightmare creature doesn’t have to spend any P.P.E. it is a natural ability. The duration is until the creature wishes it to end the Illusion, and the nightmare creature can create two illusions at level one, plus one extra illusion at levels two, four, six, eight, ten, and thirteen, the victim must save Vs. magic just like the spell every time they are faced with the illusion. The nightmare creature can let out a scream that has an evil magic power about it, the victim must roll Vs. insanity or suffer a roll on the insanity table in Rifts main book, (if same phobia or insanity comes up roll again) the creature can emit this scream and all who are in a 200’ range plus 10’ per level of creature, all in range of the monster’s scream must roll Vs. Insanity to avoid the effects of the scream, if they fail they get a life long insanity or phobia, if they make it no ill effects, the monster can scream as much as it wishes but it costs two attacks. Has very good vision, and can smell equal to a psi-hound, it’s hearing is very keen as well. Can sense supernatural creatures up to 150’ away +10’ per level of creature. Bio-Regeneration is 1d4x10 every minute. And if the creature is killed it must roll Vs. Coma or Death but gets a total of three extra rolls instead of the normal three (six total and the fiend only needs to save once to come back instead of twice or more!) if it fails all six then it is dead with no hope of recovery. On the other claw if the creature is burned with fire when it is killed no roll is made it will die instantly with no hope to return to life. Doesn’t need air to breath or sleep or rest (only needs to meditate for two to four hours a day to remain a healthy sleep like condition), only eats the blood and flesh of its victims will not eat normal food (doesn’t like normal food in any way prefers raw flesh over all other types of edibles). Can Track by smell alone at 35% +5% per level of creature. Very good and cunning hunter the nightmare creature can be seen as very animalistic at time especially when it is on the hunt and about to get a kill, they can be very coy and play with a victim like a cat and mouse game before it delivers the final mortal blow and eating it’s victim alive if it can, the nightmare creature believes there is nothing more horrid than being eaten alive by one so evil and gluttonous letting it’s victim hear its mouthfuls of victory and wicked laugh before death claims them (ghastly yuck!). The nightmare creature is very smart (equal to human I.Q.) can learn to use computers, operate vehicles and likes to use weapons of all sorts, they can use TW items naturally, and they love fast moving flying vehicles like hovercycles, or sky kings, ect. will acquire very little in the way of possessions or money and wealth, only needs a way to get around and a few mundane weapons if they feel like blasting at their victim instead, they love melee weapons and magic archaic weapons are a must for these fiends who love to fight up close and personal.

R.C.C. Skills,

Climbing +5%, Swimming +10%, Wilderness Survival +5%, Demon and Monster Lore +10%, Prowl +15%, Identify Fruits and Plants +5%, Tracking +5%, Escape Artist +15%, Lore: Fairy, Hunting, Land Navigation +10%, Languages: Lang and Literacy in two languages at 98%, plus can speak two other languages at +30% can’t read or write these, lit must be taken. Boxing, W.P. Any, W.P.: Any, W.P.: Any, Hand to Hand: Basic, or Expert at the cost of one skill or Martial Arts at the cost of two extra related skills, or assassin at the cost of three extra related skills.

Related R.C.C. skills:

The creature also gets seven other skills in the following areas, plus two skills at levels 2,4,7,8,10,13,15, all skills start at level one. The list of skills are as follows. Communications: Any, Domestic: Any, Electrical: Any, Espionage: Any: +15%, Mechanical: Any, Medical: First Aid only +5%, Military: Any:+10%, Physical: Any, Pilot:Any, except Robot and Power Armor Elite, Pilot Related: Any, Rogue: Any: +10%, W.P.’s Any, Wilderness: Any +20%, Science: None, Technical: Any.

Secondary Skills:

The nightmare creature gets five secondary skill from the areas listed above not including the related bonuses above plus one skill at levels 2,4,6,8,10,13,15, all skills start at level one.

Standard Equipment:

Starts with two sets of clothes, suit of M.D.C. armor, backpack, knapsack, two utility belts, two modern energy weapons of choice, 1d10 e-clips for each weapon, one TW-weapon of choice, 1d4 small sacks, vibro-kinfe, vibro sword (or energy vibro sword), rope 100’, poisoned food 48 meals to feed to enemy’s and if the creature is killed and the food taken,(save Vs. lethal poison or suffer 1d6x10 damage for 1d8 rounds), a few personal items. Money: 2d6x100 credits, Black Market Items: 4d6x1000. Vehicle: One of choice, 80% have hovercycles, 20% other types of vehicles.

Cybernetics:

None, can never use them due to the shape changing ability and Bio-regeneration that interferes.

Experience:

Use Werewolf experience table. ---

 

From this

 

--

Recently, ( last week ) I took a five day vacation away from everyone and everything. It brought me to realize a few things ; well, a lot of things.

 

 

 

 

 

One; that the people who I thought were friends aren't. Instead, they are girls who love drama and to induce it by assuming things and thus starting a chaos theory in their own way. Instead of asking me the questions that they had that pertained to myself in general, they assumed that I had lied about going to California, just because my car was still in front of my house. Now, let me ask a simple question ..

Why would I drive my car when my aunt's can travel the entire distance to California on one tank of gas, plus half the way to San Diego?

Answer? I wouldn't because it costs less on gas prices and it's way more fun to drive a Lexus then it is a Saturn. Come on? Seriously, if someone really had to question MY friendship to them, and actually trusted me as a friend, would they need to come to silly conclusions that I had lied and spent my VACATION home with everyone in the house that annoy me to no end? No, the answer to that is strictly no. I went to California to clear my head AFTER the fact that I had learned that those same three girls couldn't go because of something that happened between two of them and a parents car. Blah blah blah .. All bullshit, considering that they also told me that they wouldn't be able to leave their house because of one having to go to AA or recovery classes for at least TWO months before she would be able to have girls night out again. BUT THEN, what did I happen to discover? They all went out to the BAR. Which makes it a complete catch twenty-two; she's supposed to be recovering from alcohol ABUSE and then she goes to a bar, which put her back in the situation that she is already in from the actual beginning. And somehow, I become a whore in the middle of all this bullshit drama. So, what did I do? I cut ties with all three of them while being in California. It was actually when I was inside the South Coast Plaza ( HUGE MALL ) and eating Ruby's. Did any of this bring me down on my vacation? Nope! 

 

Two; I have a date planned to go to Indiana/Chicago, which is excellent because it ties into reason number three.

Three; I'm scrubbing off my debt that I have. I did a lot of stupid shit when I was young and I had credit cards. I didn't pay them on time -- or at all, which is one of the reasons why I can't get a bank account at the moment since my name is on the whatever list it is. BUT, I've decided to FINALLY start paying the bloody bastards back their money. I want to be able to be responsible again with the banks and to be able to buy a new car when my Saturn dies on me. I want to be able to move into a LOFT, which has been a dream of mine ever since I was young, I want to be able to do anything possible and still be a responsible adult. I refuse to watch myself turn into these college students with no money and nothing to do with their spare time. I want to be able to do anything like take more road trips and fly across the oceans again. 

Four; I want to be healthy again. As some of you know, I suffer from HORRIBLE chronic migraines. They are blinding and immobilizing. I want to be able to live life without having them as serve as I have. They come from the Mothers side of the family but my Aunt also has them as well. So, maybe it's just the women in the family?  I don't know but all I know is when I get them bad enough, I can't move, I don't want to be touched or have anything touching me, can't stand the lights in the house or in my room ( which are quite dim to begin with ) and I get violently ill to my stomach.  

 

New life starting.

 

// that's all, I'll continue after I come back from my week vacation in California.

Honestly, I'm not okay, whatsoever. I've been trying to keep my head held high and my emotions from showing to everyone else around me. Bottom line is that I am exhausted with pretending that everything is wonderful.

 

WORK is number one. It's pissing me off with all the people I have to deal with every single night. It's exhausting to have to smile and act  like everything is A-Okay while I'm there -- and the funny thing is that my facade is perfect due to the fact that no one asks about it. I have no problems with the people that work with me, none whatsoever. Just the people who come in and bitch about something or another. Sometimes, I just want to hop over the counter and strangle them; or shove the stamp down their throat so they die or something aweful. I'm exhausted from people calling me a WHORE because I'm not one of the females that do anything that they want or anything that they say. " YOU DON'T TALK TO MAN LIKE THAT. " Yo, fuck you. Don't call me a whore and I wouldn't be the one bitching you out over the phone or to your fucking face. Sorry that you MEN don't like the answer " no", but last time I checked, U was not one of the femmes running around half - NAKED, only after your money.

 

SCHOOL is perfect. I love learning and studying, so I have no compliants about school whatsoever. =] I'm a happy camper there.

RELATIONSHIPS. I feel like I'm honestly loosing touch with all the people very dear to me. I can't turn back the clock to make up for the missed time in between semesters and work. I'm sorry but I can't do it. And the days that I can go out and see MY GIRLS, something happens to where I can't do it -- or the other way around. I miss you guys so much, you have no idea. I love you and it seems like it has been ages since I've seen any of my LOCAL friends. Chayna, Irene, Dez, Alek, Nikki, Resa, Mare and everyone else that I'm skipping over -- I MISS YOU GUYS. Jon and I are alright, for now. I guess -- we've both have difficult days to manage enough time to actually see each other and when we do, it's heaven. Or at least, it use to be. We're both guilty of taking our anger out on eachother, our stress that elevates can be so fucking explosive that it isn't healthy for both of us. Everyone knows that I love him dearly and maybe it's just a fucking phase that we're both going through. Everyone already knows that I'm easily emotional, especially under stress, it's amazing that I have yet to lose my sanity.

 

My family, I'm running on thin ice with.  I should actually go back on my medications because it's my extreme mood swings that effect almost EVERYTHING on this list. Everything has to be a huge issue with my aunt because we're so similar in personality, it's horrible when we get to the point of wanting to rip off eachothers heads. I know that it hurts her because of the fact that she's yelling at me and I'm returning the favor. It's hard because  it takes DAYS to effect me to the same degree -- and then I'm back in my hole of utter madness. It's sickening and I'm sick of being this way, especially with her. I'm tired of getting so defensive of everything and of anyone -- that it's horribly fucking with my head. And I have to swallow my pain and pride because of it all happening again.

 

-- to be continued.

 

" You guys can still be friends. "

I offically hate Jon's friends. I do! Last night, Jay decided to get into our business. Asking how everything was going and why I was planning to visit Indiana with Jon in October. I told him and he called it self-torture. " You can never have him. You're just teasing yourself with an unobtainable goal." Yeah, fuck you. I obviously have some type of hold on Jon considering the last four years -- Or let me guess, those don't fucking count because YOU were not involved in those years whatsoever.

Seriously. Was he serious? As a heart-attack. He hates me and I dislike him for disrespecting me and disrepecting Jon in that matter to SAY ALL OF THIS behind Jon's back to my face. And then when I mention this to Jon, Jay wants to get all defensive and call me a child because I spoke what he was saying about his so-called best friend. Oh, I don't know. I thought that if you were so good friends, that you'd speak your opinions of your friends concerns and relationships/issues that you have with their current relationship/ect with them instead of hiding it -- and THUS speaking it to their partner. Seriously, dude. I thought you were the grown up here. Mr-I'm-fucking-twenty-seven-years-old. I know why your girlfriend left you, why you can't seem to find another one to take their place and why you're so fucking miserable that you feel the URGE to bring down those around you that you call ' FRIENDS '. And you call me a child because I let Jon in on the whole thing, telling him exactly what you said. Yeah,  it caused me to cry because it was fucking hurtful for what you said. But at least I know how to be a true friend and a girlfriend at the same time by telling the honest truth and not hiding bullshit things from him or any of my friends.

Grow the fuck up. You need to take a look at your life and decide if you want people to give a damn about you. The way that you're going now -- you're going to lose everyone around you due to your inadquite attitude towards others happiness and joy. You can't stand it that I make Jonathan David Palmer happy, can you. It eats you away inside and you feel the need to try to tear us apart.

 

BUT!

I'm happy to report that your little thrill of making me upset has yet to cause any friction between the man I love and myself. INSTEAD, we're even stronger now because he knows that I do not keep things from him, especially the shit that his so-called friends say about him. I shouldn't have really cared in the first place because I knew that you were a miserable piece of shit to begin with -- and miserable pieces of shit like you always try to drag their counter-parts down so they can be just as fucking miserable. But I did because I care about Jonathan. More then you will ever know in your life -- So, why don't you just continue with whatever the fuck you're doing in your spare time and crash on the way to your home of Italy.

I'll be the one in the back of the funeral, smiling the entire god damn time.   

Things are doing well in my world. Seriously, though things are sadly coming to a halt. Once Fall semester starts again, I'll be quitting at the Morgue to do school full time while still making income at the club. Yes, I have a huge thing of experience on my plate from my eight months with the Morgue but to bring it to Medical School would be extremely helpful. Work? It's going well. Yeah, I get bored with my job at work -- But I do enjoy the people I work with, even if most of them are bitches.

 

Family is well. WELL, my family is fine. I've made the choice to cut ties permanently with my sisters. Now, you might be asking yourself why. It's simple, I'm tired of being their scapegoat and being the one that they blame AUTOMATICALLY because of the bullshit past that we've all gone through. Jennifer is one bitch who thinks she knows it all -- but yet has it in her head that I'm the person who forced everyone out of her life. Sorry, not my problem nor is it my fault. Guess I'm the easy one to blame though. It's alright, I laughed at the entire thing and just baited her into getting defensive about it all. " I'm going to blame you because all I have left in my life is my Pops. Blahblahblah." AWESOME. But one thing, if I may -- THANK YOU FOR PROVING ME RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING THAT I ALWAYS KNEW WAS CORRECT, but I'm sad to report that I will not be taking the blame for the people that have left you behind. Grow the fuck up -- learn responsiblity, fucking keep a job and try not to fuck up your NEXT car. 'Kae, thanks! And the other sister, Renee? Just doesn't seem to give a shit about family anymore due to the fact that we will not except the asshole sex-offender boyfriend of hers. We all know that she's currently living with him, it's not that hard to figure out.

 

Yeah, and we've got another room mate moving in today or tomorrow. He's a friend of my dads -- Met him a few times but Dad is trying to get him together with my aunt. I think it's a good idea. I mean, he's got his shit together. Nice car and nice job as a chef at the MGM, which is the reason why my dad knows him. He doesn't have any bullshit hanging around. But my aunt's currently interested in a twenty-seven year old lawyer named Justin. She will not stop talking about him -- and the funny thing is that she wanted ME to meet him. No thank you, I've got Jon. =D As a last note, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince is an EXCELLENT movie! LOVED it.  

Okay! Things are a-okay now.

 

Life is back on track.

YAY.

 

- -  end broadcast.

Gawd! I always get all giggly and squimish when I hear a certain phase from Jon. What can I say? I'm a fucking chick -- leave me the fuck alone. Though, due to the last few days, the mood of complete blissfulness disminished quickly.

 

Let's start here ; My Great - Grandmother was admitted into the hospital AND I WAS THE LAST ONE TO KNOW. I am the only one that is closer to her then anyone else, even her own daughter and grand-daughter due to different shit. Grandma is too fucking tied up with dealing with the psychopathic grandpa Joe ( which just needs to die already and quit dealing horseshit to the family. He is the main reason why our family is completely torn. And no, he was not the one that passed away last year. That was my Grandfather Dan. ) and her Grand-daughter; my aunt is just too busy with her own life to really pay attention to anyone else at the present moment. BUT, the main reason why they didn't tell me until YESTERDAY, was the fact that they knew I would freak-the-fuck-out. Well, what do you expect me to do. Just sit tight and HOPE that my Great-Grandmother doesn't pass away alone. Sorry, not going to happen.

 

Secondly, something happened to one of my close friends, which I am not going to disclose because it gets underneath my skin so much. It's something that I wish never happens to anyone else that is close to me -- I seriously hate this subject, considering that I've lived with it.

 

THIRDLY. Tonight at work -- was going fucking dandy. UNTIL, the GM and one of our Managers decided to come back into the Club, DRUNK. Yeah, okay. They do this every Wednesday night -- but tonight was the last straw. To have a story very short; Cops were called and the GM had charges pressed against him for THROWING the manager, who was also very drunk, against the door -- which broke the fucking thing. COME ON. You don't do that in an establishment that still has customers within the building. YOU DO NOT FUCKING ACT LIKE SOME DRUNKS -- AND START THROWING THINGS AROUND, ever. And then, you definately don't start to threaten everyone who is working during your little ( TINY ) blow out just because you're the fucking GENERAL MANAGER. Who gives a fuck. I sure don't -- and if I wasn't fucking scared shitless, fucking shaking until Mark had cashed me out and closed down my drawer, I would've been the one to call the damn cops. All I have to say to that is THANKS for making me scared of you. Thanks to the guys watching out if shit went through the roof and thanks to Mark for letting me escape the entire HELL of it while I was trying NOT to cry out of fear. I do not like people throwing each other around -- and I don't like the sounds of it all when someone is CRYING for some help -- And when you can't do shit because hell, THE ONE WHO IS DOING THE MAIN DAMAGE IS THE FUCKING TOP DOG. -Le'Sigh-

 

On more of a good point, I'll be getting back into my mood of continuing to write " Dream Virus ". Lately, I've been completely swamped with - normal - life and trying to clear my head. I need to finish the book, I need to. Yeah, I'll get around to it. It probably won't be published until I'm like .. in my death bed. HA.

 

 

 This is actually a model that I'm using as a writing tool for one of the minor characters within the book. Should be fun!

That you've completely deemed yourself a fucking asshole for not listening to the whole issue when it comes to a friend of yours that you known for YEARS. Yeah, that's how I feel now. Though, in some way, I feel that she's telling me to fuck off. You know that whole thing about not really wanting to talk -- That's awesome and great, but when you have a friend that you are SERIOUSLY worried about and haven't spoken to for a few weeks due to busy weeks ( whatever you have for an excuse for me! ) but seriously, it shouldn't be that hard to voice out what is going on without having to be DIRECTING someone to their fucking blog. Yeah, things might be easier for YOU, but deary; you've got to SPEAK VOLUMES when it comes to things being wrong in your life and whatever else have you. It's better to TALK it out then just link over a blog and spat out, "It's all in my blog. I'm not going to text it out. " FUCK THAT SHIT. Everyone knows me well enough to know for a damn fact that I don't like to fool around with friend's bullshit, finding myself having to DIG underneath the skin just to figure what the fuck the issue is. I hate that! I shouldn't have to do it whatsoever, it annoys me that people CONTINUOUSLY can not understand that.

 

Now, I love helping out my friends any way I can. Love talking to them and hearing them out -- love guiding them in the direction that I believe is best for them, but yet again; not actually giving direct demands of them following it out as I say. Though,  lately this fallout seems to be mostly on my shoulders considering that I am extremely busy now a days and when I'm not working -- I'm TRYING to work on another forum writing site for myself and others to enjoy ourselves and ESCAPE from the stress of every day living. But I am not going to apologise for not being there when they decide that they want to continue to keep things BOTTLED UP. How can you expect me to do that when I've got my own life to live and my own CAREER to continue to build. I am twenty-two years old and yet, I seem to feel as if I'm being dragged through MIDDLE SCHOOL again with all this shit of hide-and-seek feelings.I am in MEDICAL SCHOOL -- I do not need this shit to continue to be on my mind day in and day out; when I reach out towards someone, I expect them to grab my FUCKING HAND and pull themselves up -- To open up and speak. Now, I know that all things can not be spoken about easily but I've always told those who've I keep close that they can speak to me about ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. Yeah, we all have our hardships but don't go fucking hiding yourself just because someone isn't going through the same shit as you are. You have no idea who is going through what. YOU wouldn't know because you haven't been around lately -- For the last SIX MONTHS, but who was the one always trying to get you to talk to them?

 

Yeah, think about that while you digest your weekly poison.

 

 

-- MOVING ON;

This past weekend, I went camping in Zion. OMFG, can you say beautiful? I worked on my secret passion which is photography and I took EXCELLENT pictures. We also went to Silver Reef and Leeds; both towns are completely amazing in their own way. AND IT RAINED during the morning on Saturday. I pranced around and even danced. LOL. Yes, I love dancing in the rain. Though, the entire trip but me in motion of completing other events and planning road trips to New Mexico for the ZUNI INDIANS culture. I'm going to try to contact them to gain permission to take a few photographs of their culture; to capture living and dying culture at the same time. Dry Fork Canyon is another place I plan to go to -- a lot of paranormal activity up there, which is another secret OBESSION. This weekend, Or rather -- FRIDAY, I'm planning to drive to Goldfeild to take a few photographs of the town itself. Has anyone actually heard the background of Goldfeild? OMG, it's amazing and it's very sad all at the same time. You definately need to research on it because there is so much RICH HISTORY that I would be here for HOURS.  

 

 

P.S.

I love that song by SKILLET -- Comatose. Fuckingmakes me whine for the Geekface every single time I hear it.

I am sick and tired of continuously being harassed by a certain coworker at work. Yeah, I know he does not like me one fucking bit -- but last time I checked, I was not in junior high. I am a grown adult and I am three credits away from my Bachelors degree, I don't need to deal with this bullshit from some worm at work who doesn't even do a god damn thing other then making sure people do not park in the valet parking.

 

WHAT THE FUCK.

 

It's stopping TODAY. Or I'm walking out of the building with a phone call to the Corporate office.